I am 14 years old, and I have been really depressed and I find it extremely hard talking. I am not social and I try really hard to be, but I can’t :(. When I am with my friends, it is very hard to come up with something to say, and it becomes all awkwardly silent. Everyday I am very depressed. I sob every night. For no reason. Everyday. Why am I like this? I am suicidal SOMETIMES and I am getting help. But still… MY friends are all excited and having fun and making up jokes while I just slowly follow. I don’t have any comebacks. WHY AM I SO BORING AND DEPRESSED? I am very boring and I absolutely hate being in social places. Why am I such an introvert? PLEASE HELP ME!! PLEASE!
1. Depressed for no reason
2. Find it very hard to come up with conversations
3. Very shy
I also sit alone at lunch… My best friends don’t sit with me either. Only sometimes..
I see my best friend talking to her best friend having fun.. I can’t have fun because I am depressed EVERY. DAY. I feel useless and I have a very hard time finding the good in life. Its like I’m literally living in a dark hole.
I LEAVE MYSELF OUT. I have no idea why. I just walk away when my friends all have fun. I get depressed so much. I also take meds… I just want someone to tell me it will be all right. Because so far it is not ok. I also have no energy either. I am too calm. I am not good enough either.
Sometimes life can feel like going up a down escalator. I appreciate you taking the time to write us and hope I can offer something that will be helpful. You have taken what is often the most difficult step of reaching out to us here. That is something we want to build on. You say you are getting help for your thoughts—that is very good. Perhaps you can ask that person about finding some social skills groups for others who have difficulty talking. Oftentimes a small group with a well-trained facilitator can do wonders to teach you the basics of joining with other people.
You are not alone. Your school also has counselors who have been trained to help students cope. I would talk to him or her and let them know you are hurting. Being able to tell someone in a position to help is important. The sadness you are feeling can come from many sources, but whatever the cause is there are people and resources available to help. You can begin by joining one of our free forums here at psychcentral. This gives you a connection with others who will understand.
Wishing you patience and peace,