I’ve progressively isolated myself due to underlying issues committed in childhood prior to overcoming a self-indulgent bout of negligent atheism, all the while hypothetically considering punishment to come in the afterlife (though never later in life, which was the largest sort of “karmic” disregard). Should I be held to the standard of faith persevering through childhood regardless of my situational experiences that may have influenced me/made me sour? Probably. May this post-isolation, asocial behavior, and cognitive deceleration be overcome? My optimism says that with genuine help and love from another/few who is/are unpaid and not eager to jump to diagnoses while also being invested in my growth, it can and will be. My pessimism speaks on the idea that this pragmatism is often used to manipulate and regress.
I just want to do good, and being able to overcome the anxiety caused by the years and years of formulating and growing into behavioral patterns that are merely self-rewarding, self-deprecating, and loathsome at best is necessary in order to ever give back any kind of reparation in which I am beyond capable of in my young and able body. I feel I can still conjure feasible thoughts and methods of reasoning, being that guilt is a seemingly human response to have in regard to this kind of situation. The biggest problems I have are based on humiliation in a public basis, as well as fear of (being that many people are generally aware of my isolation and rumored cause of said isolation and depression). I call it bad karma, though this isn’t something necessarily accepted in psychology. I feel like just being aware of the past has always had heavy influence on how I would expect situations to go; almost a sense of deserving. What is the most puzzling is that so many exist entirely unscathed by their selectively known metaphorical skeletons? Be it through avoiding any activity making themselves feel weak, consistent positive surroundings of like-minded people, or mere will-power. Am I simply weak? Am I giving power to the negatives by seeking “help”?
The idea that seeking help makes you weak seems to be deeply ingrained into our culture. It prevents many people from prospering. The World Health Organization estimates that over 450 million people suffer from mental health disorders around the world. Approximately two-thirds of those people never seek help, often because they believe that mental illness is a personal failure for which they should be ashamed. The result is that many people suffer unnecessarily with highly treatable problems.
If you broke your leg and needed surgery, you’d see a surgeon. If you had a cavity, you wouldn’t attempt to fill it on your own; you’d see a dentist. Should you want to build a new home, it would be advisable to consult a general contractor or hire one to do the job. It is unlikely that consulting any of the aforementioned professionals would cause you to feel weak or bad about yourself. That same logic should apply to mental health problems. It’s unrealistic to believe that you can treat psychological problems without any training whatsoever. Nor should one expect friends or family members to treat psychological problems. Assuredly, they care about you and want to help but they simply aren’t trained for the job.
Therapists learn to treat psychological problems through years of study and training. It is not innate knowledge. It must be learned, much like the skills of surgery and dentistry and general contracting.
People who struggle are not weak. They are the norm. Everyone struggles at some point in their lives and would benefit from help. It’s the nature of living in a complex and confusing world.
My advice is to seek professional help. Counseling is the most efficient way to remove psychological roadblocks from your life. Hopefully this advice helps. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle