I was wondering how to tell if you are just having extreme guilt or delusions with depression? It seems like a fine line and difficult to tell. I was ruminating on past things I felt a lot of guilt about and decided I was nearly evil and a monster which increased my symptoms for a while. I was somewhat aware it was extreme, but it also felt very real. I have never had this with depression before, but I really felt like I deserved bad things to happen to me because I was intrinsically bad and needed to pay for my sins so to speak. Like I must be punished in a violent way. Evidence to the contrary just wasn’t enough to shake this.
Focusing on the guilt is often a way of not focusing on something else. The something else in this case is self-forgiveness. Ruminating about the guilt may be a more familiar place to land your thoughts — and important to help you recover — but the more immediate, and perhaps even more important work is on finding ways to forgive yourself for your transgressions. This article gives a perspective of some of the ways this can happen. This article gives some practical advice.
Wishing you patience and peace,