My mother and father treat me quite differently. My father treats me pretty nicely, though he expresses doubts about my mother’s way of treating me. She definitely favors my sister, and even worse, doesn’t like to admit it either, even though it is plain as day.
As for me, I’ve gotten used to that over the years, however, recently, I’ve started getting empty feelings and like there is no happiness in the world. Laughing is a foreign concept.
Another thing is that my mother loves lecturing me about how naïve I am and how I cannot possibly understand the real world. However, she appears not to see me literally wilting in front of her implied insults that she hurls at me without remorse. And, when I think about talking to her about how I might feel, it never seems to turn out right.
Then there are also other consequences because of these feelings. First off, I tend to binge on junk food, then, afterwards, feel really bad about it and my self-esteem will drop. Also, I lash out at the people who actually love me, leaving them confused. Help me! 🙁
I am sorry you are going through all of this difficulty. Your father sounds like he may be the best person to talk to to help you with your mom. She doesn’t sound very supportive or helpful, and your dad might be able to talk to her about treating you better. I’d try this approach first, but if it doesn’t improved ask you dad if you can see a therapist. The way you are feeling sounds like it comes directly from interactions with your mom. At 13 years old you need more support than you are getting from her — and a therapist might help you find ways to get that.
Wishing you patience and peace,