It’s been a year since I’ve been getting these thoughts (they aren’t external). But recently they have been getting more and more violent. They make me hit myself or I will jerk my head and scream “no” when the voice decides to bother me. Usually it will make me do things, or else something bad will happen. Other times it will make me hurt myself. These thoughts give me horrible anxiety but I’ve never gotten actual mental health. My brother is already in therapy from our traumatic experiences, but my parents just think I’m copying my brother’s behavior. I don’t want to self-diagnose, but I don’t want to sound greedy if i beg for help. What are these voices, and what should I do?
It is in no way “greedy” to ask for help. Both you and your brother are equally deserving. If your parents don’t believe you, show them this letter and response. Perhaps they will see that you are serious about your desire for help.
If your parents won’t assist you, then ask the school guidance counselor or another trusted faculty member. If not them, then ask a trusted adult or church official. If all else fails, you might try contacting the state department of social services. They will assist you in receiving the proper treatment.
In the meantime, resist the urge to self-harm. You have a choice in the matter. You don’t have to take it out on yourself. The voices have no power if you refuse to listen to them. Understandably, it may be difficult but try anyway.
Try to distract yourself. Be in the presence of others so that you don’t have the opportunity to engage in self-harm. Don’t hesitate to contact the authorities if you cannot keep yourself safe. They will protect you and ensure that you receive the proper treatment. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle