I’m a complete loner. If I could, I would just live alone for the rest of my life, like a hermit. I have only three friends, and rarely hang out with them. I get told that I’m not emotional enough, and I hold little sentiment. I can cut off friendships without a second thought. I’m a chronic liar, and half the time I don’t even realize I’m in the middle of a lie until I’ve said it. Most of the time, there’s not even a reason to lie, I don’t know why I do it. I also get told I’m not concerned enough with other peoples’ problems. I don’t know how to be “loving,” and I don’t know how to console and make people feel better when they’re upset. I don’t know if this is anything strange, but I have a deep interest in true crime. I know more about the Unabomber than I do about most of my family members. Any free time I have, I spend it reading about criminals. I’m not too concerned, but it does get tricky trying to act like someone I’m not. I’m curious if there might be something wrong with my head, or if it’s just who I am.
You consider yourself a “complete loner” but have three close friends. That would suggest you’re not a complete loner. Someone who is a “complete loner” doesn’t interact with anyone. They don’t have friends or acquaintances.
You also stated that you “get told” things about yourself such as you’re not emotional enough or that you hold “little sentiment,” and so forth. I’m wondering who’s telling you these things. The source is important. It could have helped me to determine the validity of the source. Friends can be biased whereas someone like a school official or a therapist would be more objective.
You also stated that you have an interest in true crime. That in itself is not necessarily a problem. However, in the context of increasing social isolation and difficulty interacting with people, it may be a sign that something is wrong.
Generally speaking, when you are concerned about your mental health, you should be evaluated by a professional to determine if something is wrong. Counseling is the ideal remedy for developing the requisite social skills for healthy relationships. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle