The majority of my life I’ve been bullied and I held it in, my parents would tell me that I wouldn’t amount to anything and I’ll be lucky to get through college. Usually i just hold it in and when Im alone i blow up in emotions so no one sees me. In my culture it is considered nearly a sin to discuss depression. Sometimes i get suicidal but it hasn’t happened in a long time. Not long ago my sister got married and left but I feel like my best friend is gone. Ive never been in a relationship and I’ve never had a “friend” for more than a few weeks. I just get pushed to the side and half the time I’m forgotten. How do I find someone that’s a true friend? And stop the depression before it gets too far?
Your depression symptoms are worsening and you sometimes have suicidal thoughts. These symptoms may stem from having been bullied and treated poorly by your family.
Relationships, in general, are a challenge for you. You characterized your past friendships as being neglectful. In the absence of healthy and positive relationship role models, you may be inadvertently choosing the wrong friends. Counseling could help you make better choices regarding friends and knowing how to navigate these relationships.
When it becomes evident that a problem is worsening, it is advisable to seek treatment. If you had a physical health problem and your symptoms were worsening, you probably would not hesitate to consult a professional. You should have the same attitude towards mental health symptoms, even if it goes against the norms of your family or culture.
Depression is a highly treatable condition but you first have to be open to treatment. I hope that you will consider counseling even if it goes against your cultural norms. Critical thinkers, who Abraham Maslow describes as the only truly healthy people, don’t abide by cultural norms. They think for themselves and are guided by the truth. Cultural norms come and go. They were different 100 years ago and will be different, in different ways, a hundred years from now. Which are or were the right ones? I hope that you will consider my advice. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle