My boyfriend has lied to me about his going out with another girl. they went to the movies together but what he told me was he was alone shopping for electronics. several people saw them together but he didn’t tell me about the girl or that they went out. i only figured out when a mutual friend confessed to me about it and when i confronted my boyfriend he confirmed it but said that there was nothing between them. a couple of weeks away from him, i decided to give him another chance but a month later, he told me that he invited the girl to his church and told me he wanted to be honest and that there are no feelings involved. i am confused on why he is still communicating with the girl knowing what i might feel. i am really confused if i should just let this go because i know i don’t deserve to feel this way or if i should give him another chance. (From the Philippines)
Your boyfriend has proven two things to you. That he is willing to lie about something because he knows it is wrong, and that he is willing to keep doing something even though he knows it will bother you. These are two of the more difficult things to change in a relationship. He hasn’t understood (or cared) that this is a problem for you. This isn’t worth you putting up with. If he doesn’t understand that this is hurtful then let him know that you think more of yourself than letting him be careless with your feelings by disregarding them. Inform him you’d rather not hang around waiting to get hurt again — and mean it. Be sure this isn’t a ploy to get him back. Once you say you are going, it is time to go.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
