Q: I am 17 years old and my boyfriend wants a threesome with someone he had a major crush on …. When me and him first met he said he couldn’t date me because he wasn’t over that person and I gave him time and we got together. I trusted him to be around that person no problem and later on he comes and says that the feelings came back and now he says he wants a threesome with that same person. The idea of a threesome does interest me but I’m conflicted because I’m afraid he’ll get the feelings for that person again? I love him but I worry that this isn’t healthy …. Any advice?
I would encourage you to not participate in anything, sexually or otherwise, that makes you uncomfortable in this relationship. It sounds as though your boyfriend never stopped having feelings for this person. Before making a decision about whether or not to proceed, I would encourage you to explore what it is that excites you about a threesome and also what it is that excites your boyfriend about a threesome. Explore with your boyfriend why it is that he wants to pursue this with someone he was previously involved in a relationship with.
– Dr. Mimi