Why do people spread rumours about me? I am glad that I found this fourm. All my life I have been the subject of the rumor mill. I am a shy guy who tries to do the right things. I believe in dealing with people as fairly as possible. It has been hard for me to understand why people would spread rumors about me. When the rumors are place side by side that just don’t add up? Let me tell you all of them. In high school and college, I was a virgin. I would like to have had sex with the person I married. I express my views and it was well known. However, some people spreaded a rumor that I was gay. I never could understand that rumor because I like women. I just did want to sleep with them because I wanted a degree and job. I knew that could side track me too much.
I have another rumor that I am telling with. Some people believe that I like little boys. I can not for the life of me understand why they started that rumor.
The final rumor is some lady in telling people on the job that I am stalking her. It is strange because I have not spoken to this person since jan. I was working on her computer in dec. While I was working on her computer, she started telling me about her trip to FL. Later that day, I was working on another computer and she came in to the office. She started talking to me and another guy. To make a long story short, She stayed 15-20 minutes past her quitting time. One of her friends told her that she was going to miss the plane.
She returned in jan. I was in her area working on someone computer. When I finished, I thought that I would stop by her office to welcome her back and ask how was her trip. When I was walking out the person office, one of the supervisor was in the hallway. I passed by the girl’s office but she was not in. I was walking by another lady office and she was in that office. I thought I was just say hi and ask about her trip. She looked at me and looked the other way. Every since that day, I have not spoken to her unless she speaks first.
I also notice that people are following me a round the office. Every time that I am on that side of the building two things will happen. 1) She leaves her office and goes to another office. 2) Someone comes and stand at her door. She acts as if I am threat when she is a round other people, but ther have been times when she have passed by ne at the front door and I ran away from her. Therefore, she know that I am not a threat. Also, I notice that people are standing outside the door when I am working on a computer. I have done everything in my powers to stay away from this person as much as possible. Yet the rumors continues. What do I need to do to stop the rumors?
A. The question that you have to ask your self is why do so many people consistently misinterpret and misjudge both your behavior and intentions. It’s possible that you have surrounded yourself with people who are not competent to judge you or it’s possible you have surrounded yourself with people who are competent to judge you. I think it’s fairly safe to say that the people around you fall some where in between factual and inaccurate in their judgments. It’s important for you to recognize that though you may not be guilty of the things you are accused of there is something sufficiently odd about your behavior such that it generates rumors and misperceptions. You said you’ve had a lifelong problem with people saying these things about you, creating these rumors. Though these things may not be true, you have to determine what you are doing to cause people to form false negative opinions about you. I would recommend that you work with a good therapist who can help you to identify these things.