Q. I am 24 and I am scared for my life. I have many symptoms of believe it or not, both DID and schizophrenia. I have at least 10 personalities some of which are very weird such as a bird who believes he can fly, an alien, a 5 and 2 year old, and many more. A few of them only came out once or twice. Some of the personalities I am aware of and others I don’t remember what happened when I was in that personality.
I occasionally hear voices, see things, and feel things. The hallucinations aren’t too bad because I am on a medication for that. I sometimes get confused in my speech and make no sense to people. It becomes extremely disorganized. An example would be, “You know who the cow computer what the sky is confused in the blah.” Then the CIA/ FBI and the aliens are fighting for control over my body. I killed 350,000 people through my psychic dreams and this is why the government is after me. I influenced the tsunami back in 2004, plane crashes, earthquakes, and bombings. I can’t figure out why the aliens are after me. Both groups put devices in me to control my thoughts and movements. The government put a chip in my arm and the aliens put a device in my brain! I get instructions from them in what to do all day long. Some of those things are deadly to me such as jumping in front of traffic, jumping out of a moving car, and even cutting myself.
I feel and hear the device at times. When I don’t obey them, I see their UFO’s and their shadows in my room. It scares me to death. They also put a device somewhere on Earth that broadcasts my thoughts to the world and when I’m in big crowds, I get a panic attack. The doctors think I’m delusional. I don’t. I have inappropriate emotions and laugh at everything. Even if the world ends, I would laugh! I confuse reality and dreams all the time. I sometimes freeze when I’m walking and when I’m doing things but I don’t think it’s long enough to be catatonia. The longest I froze is about an hour. Most of the time it’s a few minutes.
I have severe depression as well. I have no energy, lack interest in things I used to love, I sleep all day long (sometimes as long as 18 hours) I believe that is hypersomnia. So, is it schizophrenia, DID, depression , anxiety or all of it? If it is schizophrenia what sub type of it is it? Disorganized, paranoid or is it schizoaffective disorder because of the depression?
It is really difficult for me to know what disorder or host of disorders you are suffering with. There is no way for me to know this based on one short letter. You may be suffering from both DID and schizophrenia. Or, because you are having trouble recognizing reality, it could be that you just have schizophrenia and all of the personalities that you believe you have are delusions. Only a skilled mental health professional who met with you in-person could know what your diagnosis is.
I hope that you have a psychiatrist and a therapist to work with you to get a handle of all of your symptoms. You are having many troubling symptoms that I imagine make it difficult for you to manage day-to-day life. If you have not connected with mental health professionals, I advise that you do so, as soon as you can. I am sorry that I could not answer your question about which disorder you have. Getting an accurate diagnosis can be helpful but getting treatment for whatever it is that you are suffering from is imperative. Take care.
