New York Times reporter Benedict Carey referred to tears in a recent piece as “emotional perspiration.” Given that I sweat a lot and hate deodorant, I suppose it makes sense that I weep often. But I’m not going to apologize for that, because after a good cry, I always feel cleansed, like my heart and mind just rubbed each other’s backs in a warm bath.
In his intriguing article, “The Miracle of Tears” , from which I’ve lifted some of the research for this post, author Jerry Bergman writes: “Tears are just one of many miracles which work so well that we taken them for granted every day.” Here, then, are seven ways tears and the phenomenon we call “crying” heal us physiologically, psychologically, and spiritually.
1. Tears help us see.
Starting with the most basic function of tears, they enable us to see. Literally. Tears not only lubricate our eyeballs and eyelids, they also prevent dehydration of our various mucous membranes. No lubrication, no eyesight. Writes Bergman: “Without tears, life would be drastically different for humans–in the short run enormously uncomfortable, and in the long run eyesight would be blocked out altogether.”
2. Tears kill bacteria.
No need for Clorox wipes. We’ve got tears! Our own antibacterial and antiviral agent working for us, fighting off all the germs we pick up on community computers, shopping carts, public sinks, and all those places the nasty little guys make their homes and procreate. Tears contain lysozyme, a fluid that the germaphobic dreams about in her sleep, because it can kill 90 to 95 percent of all bacteria in just five to 10 minutes! Which translates, I’m guessing, to three months’ worth of colds and stomach viruses.
3. Tears remove toxins.
Biochemist William Frey, who has been researching tears for as long as I’ve been searching for sanity, found in one study that emotional tears–those formed in distress or grief–contained more toxic byproducts than tears of irritation (think onion peeling). Are tears toxic then? No! They actually remove toxins from our body that build up courtesy of stress. They are like a natural therapy or massage session, but they cost a lot less!
4. Crying can elevate mood.
Do you know what your manganese level is? No, neither do I. But chances are that you will feel better if it’s lower because overexposure to manganese can cause bad stuff: anxiety, nervousness, irritability, fatigue, aggression, emotional disturbance and the rest of the feelings that live inside my happy head rent-free. The act of crying can lower a person’s manganese level. And just like with the toxins I mentioned in my last point, emotional tears contain 24 percent higher albumin protein concentration–responsible for transporting many small molecules (which has to be a good thing, right?)–than irritation tears.
5. Crying lowers stress.
Tears really are like perspiration in that exercising and crying both relieve stress. For real. In his article, Bergman explains that tears remove some of the chemicals built up in the body from stress, like the endorphin leucine-enkaphalin and prolactin, the hormone I overproduce because of my pituitary tumor that affects my mood and stress tolerance. The opposite is true too. Bergman writes, “Suppressing tears increases stress levels, and contributes to diseases aggravated by stress, such as high blood pressure, heart problems, and peptic ulcers.”
6. Tears build community.
In her “Science Digest” article, writer Ashley Montagu argued that crying not only contributes to good health, but it also builds community. I know what you’re thinking: “Well, yeah, but not the right kind of community. I mean, I might ask the woman bawling her eyes out behind me in church what’s wrong or if I can help her, but I’m certainly not going to invite her to dinner.” I beg to differ. As a prolific crier, especially on video, I always come away astounded by the comments … the resounding support of people I don’t know all that well, and the level of intimacy exchanged among them. Read for yourselves some of the comments on both my self-esteem video and my recent death and dying video and you’ll appreciate my point. Tears help communication and foster community.
7. Tears release feelings.
Even if you haven’t just been through something traumatic or are severely depressed, the average Joe goes through his day accumulating conflicts and resentments. Sometimes they gather inside the limbic system of the brain and in certain corners of the heart. Crying is cathartic. It lets the devils out before they wreak all kind of havoc with the nervous and cardiovascular systems. Writes John Bradshaw in his bestseller “Home Coming”: “All these feelings need to be felt. We need to stomp and storm; to sob and cry; to perspire and tremble.” Amen, Brother Bradford!
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20 comments
Sounds good to me! Thanks!
Thanks, Therese, for such an informative discussion about tears. Especially the physiological and hormonal aspects.
Crying always makes my head hurt and my eyes really puffy. Is it bad if you haven’t had a really big cry in almost a year?
Crying is also related to laughing – the muscles used in the face are mostly the same, and so are the breathing patterns. The natural high of crying is no different than the natural high of laughing.
Also, one of the defining charactaristics of clinical depression is profound sadness WITHOUT tears. I’ve been on both sides of this and am now a crying advocate. I have encountered the stigma about being “over emotional,” but my personal experience has shown me that it’s when you don’t express the emotions that you’re naturally inclined to that you start to have problems!
i am a guy but i know i am not ashamed of my tears. i let them flow a lot at movies and church, i am a happy crier and sad sad crier but i know i feel better to after a good cry. it helps to the wife is a crier too.
Thank you
My long term partner recently left me. I had a serious cry about it! I felt marginally better, had not cried for most of my adult life.
I have PTSD from parental abuse and i have to cry often. if i didn’t i feel like i may die with the emotions and pain inside
There is nothing wrong with a good cry, no matter what gender you are… I don’t think I could trust someone who didn’t ever cry… I just feel that the older I get, the more apt I am to cry… I cry for everything… I cry for my own losses, my gains, my friends, their pains, their accomplishments, my own… I even cry for strangers… I am so worried about the state of our world and what is going to happen, that I cry too often… I wish that more people would open their hearts and minds and see that everything that is going on in our world today is a repeat of history, in some way and we have all been warned… I am worried about bringing more children into this world to possibly suffer at the hands of man
Hi i just wanted to put my thoughts down here thinking that you are definately on to something here with the whole crying thing, i’m 27 and im pretty sure i have depresstion, i feel generally sad about everything for no real reason but one of these triggers, is my best friend, my dog, shes getting old shes been around for about 16 years and starting to have arthritis, just recently she stopped being able to jump up on the bench we have outside and she loves that thing, but something happened today as i went to feed her in the morning when she sees me on the bench, she gets up with that limp and goes over to feet and looks to the distance likes shes protecting me, i’m thinking what are you going to do if something was really there?? but i just broke down and cried, i bent down and gave her a kiss and a hug and i told her i loved her so much…like i couldnt stop crying for a good 10 minutes with her…i feel alot better but crying as i type this…i wish she knew how much i love her lol
Hi Wes. Im glad you got relief. My tears of late have been the lack of my emotion my partner shows me but has no problem showing to his dog. Mind you I am human and am loving and supportive to him. Do things for him had even forgave his infidelity and lies. The dog has not done anyhing for him. Gone to bat for him as I have. Having that amount of emotion for an animal however loyal is not healthy though i respect you. Can u or have you had a healthy adult relationship? I ask sincerely. Trust me the love you get and give to a human made in gods image will far exceed a dogs but its so worth it. Even though my love and emotion is not returned in full i will never give to dogs ir any animal the guft if live that our heavenly father has reserved for his children, us human beings. Dont misplace the real mission god put us here for and that is for other human souls. I say this in love. I do love animals but i will never place them in high regard as humans. Not saying that u do. It just struck a chord.
The woman you replied to shared a very heartwarming moment and you have nothing better to do than be critical. Crying is crying, no matter the reason. No need to bring religion and God into this. Was it gods intention for you to say such things? I reckon not. Humans are not the only thing worth crying for. Get over yourself. You have no right to ask of her personal life.
hi every one thanks for sharing yours advise I have one question? is there any one help me pls actually my èys was too too big 3year before but now is its become very very small I cry a lot because my hubby cheating with me he fall in love with other lady that is reason m crying lot he is with me still but I can’t trust him anymore leave it just want to know about my eyes is this the reason plssss plssss help and yes my eyes color also change how I will get back my big and hazel color eyes back poss help me thanks
You meant to write in the last line, “Amen, Brother Bradshaw!” but it came out “Amen, Brother Bradford!”
Anyway, I couldn’t agree more. Thank you for writing this column. I just had some stress build up and was feeling horrible and scared, and I just let loose and cried, and like magic, the horrible, frightening feeling left me.
One of the major problems is that many people cannot tolerate when someone else cries. Some of my close relatives yell at me to “Stop crying!” if I am telling them something that pains me, and I know they are wrong, but I cannot convince them that tears heal. It’s so frustrating. Maybe I will send them this column.
I have the opposite problem. I can’t cry. I have a severe case of PTSD from a job I worked at where the boss was on my back constantly. She was a small, evil, petty bitch who delighted in demeaning me in public; totally undeserved because I am an excellent employee with a great work ethic who always goes above and beyond. I finally quit when I felt like I was going to have a heart attack if I went to work again. I found out later that getting me out was a concerted effort on her part because she wanted to replace me with a relative. Anyway, I was fortunate and found another job right away, but though it is over 2 years now I walk around on the verge of tears, and my eyes do tear, though I can’t let it all out and just bawl my eyes out. I constantly have a pressure around my eyes like they are full of tears but I just can’t let loose. I know the way I look is disconcerting to those around me because, as my sister said, I look profoundly sad. Any suggestions besides seeing an analyst (I have) who just wants to give me pills and call it a day?
Hey Ana,
It seems like you need to find someone who is not in the medical field. Someone that is willing to listen and sit there with you while you talk about your problems. It’s almost if you need to find your way on your own to your true sadness. I would suggest maybe finding a humanistic psychologist if you cannot find someone you know. They believe that you will find “peace” as you lead yourself to why you are sad. They are there as if they are a friend. Try looking up humanistic psych sometime, you may find something that will help you !
Hi Ana, I just wanted to say that I related to your story. Only in my case she wanted to either protect her own job or prevent her bosses from knowing how little work she actually did.
Thanks for this. I have depression. I am pretty sure of it. My mom has it and I prefer to not treat it with medicine because I have seen her dependency on it. I usually smoke a bit of marijuana and that usually helps. Well, recently I have had to get a new job, so I have had to stop smoking. Needless to say, my depression is back in full force. Rather than hold in my anger, I cried this morning on the way to work and I cannot believe how my mood has improved. So much so, that I felt the need to look this phenomenon up. I felt a release.
I have manic depression\bi-polair type 1. This blog helped me. For that I say thank you.
2020??