Do you still have your favorite blanket, pillow, or plush toy from your childhood?
If you do, don’t fear — you’re amongst good company.
Our partner LiveScience has the story by examining the data that drives our need to keep these reminders from our childhood. We believe these objects hold something of greater value to us than just their outward appearance or physical properties. Scientists call this belief “essentialism.”
Essentialism is why we don’t feel the same about replacing a lost object, whether it be our wedding ring, a toy from our childhood, or our cherished iPhone. The new object loses that emotional attachment the original had.
That’s one of the reasons some of us hang on to those childhood toys or objects — they hold an emotional value to us that is hard to put into words and far exceeds the physical nature of the object itself.
One of my friends enjoys this sort of bonding with every car she has ever owned. Not only does she name it, but she forms a bond that could only be described as an emotional attachment with the car. Another one of my friends has a small pillow she’s had since childhood. Although the pillow itself is hideous to look at, the emotional connection to that pillow has been formed and can’t readily be broken.
Belief in essentialism starts early. In a 2007 study published in the journal Cognition, Hood and his colleagues told 3- to 6-year-old children that they could put their toys in a “copy box” that would exchange them for duplicates. The kids didn’t care whether they played with originals or duplicates of most toys, but when offered the chance to duplicate their most cherished item, 25 percent refused. Most of those who did agree to duplicate their beloved toy wanted the original back right away, Hood reported. The kids had an emotional connection to that blanket, or that teddy bear, not one that looked just like it.
Even in adulthood, those emotions don’t fade. In a study published in August 2010 in the Journal of Cognition and Culture, Hood and his fellow researchers asked people to cut up photographs of a cherished item. While the participants cut, the researchers recorded their galvanic skin response, a measure of tiny changes in sweat production on the skin. The more sweat, the more agitated the person.
For me, my object was a “grandpa” doll I cherished and slept with all throughout childhood. It reminded me of my grand dads (both of them, actually). At some point, it found its way into the attic and I lost the emotional connection with the doll. When it resurfaced a few years ago, I look at it fondly, but not with the same strong attachment I knew I once shared for it.
Touching an object is also a big part of what makes us take “ownership” of it emotionally. The article explains this in greater detail, and is worth the read if you’ve ever wondered why people form these seemingly irrational attachments to inanimate objects.
Read the full article: Even Grown-Ups Need Security Blankets
What’s your security blanket?
What object did you have an emotional attachment with? Do you still have it?
58 comments
Hi. I am 32 and still have my security blanket, nicknamed Germ, clearly, for the amount of times it gets washed!?! It is a very very old pyjama top that is very soft. I mostly lick it but touch and smell have a lot to do with the comfort that I get from it. I can sleep without it but definately choose not to.
I have two young sons and when we are in bed they do see me with it so I am a little concerned that they may either copy or get teased if they mentioned it to their friends. I have no shame! So it is not embarrassment, trust me!
Hello, Im a 29 year old mother of three and I too have a security blanket. I’ve had it since I was a little girl and it is small and almost in shreads from my family members trying to destroy it. They think its the dirtiest thing ever(lol) but I am so comfortable with it. It’s hard for me to sleep without it. Not only do I have this sheet but while feeling the sheet I tongue thrust and sometimes have to sniff and rub it on my face. Sounds weird but it is the most comforting thing to me. I don’t no why I do this but one of my sisters carried a sheet around as well but she grew out of it and threw hers away. Guess I haven’t made it to that point yet.
Here I am thinking I was alone. Grown woman with a blankly. I was told I was wrapped in a babyshower gift and never been the same since. Which is my blanky. I go nowhere without a piece of it. Mine is of a silky material. Which is found in some winter coat linings, the trim of some blankets my husband for Valentines day found a whole bedspread and pillow case set made out of the material and I love it. The pillowcase is my travel sizeand the bedspread is well…unexplainably comforting. When I have my blanket nothing bothers me. This material rubbed against my skin is the best feeling in the world. People who know me ask if I still have it and whats funny is I can’t see life without it. This blanket is apart of me always. PERIOD
I do the same thing with my blanket. I use it more as a pillow/rubbing object. I also do the “tongue” thing as well. I never have a pacifier as a baby, it was always my blanket and “sucking my tongue.” my family has tried and tried to get me to get rid of it. But, at the ripe old age of 26, i still have it. Its right under my nose right now. lol
I’m 26 this year and I still have my comfort blanket. I can’t sleep without it, and if I drop it during the night I wake up looking for it, I haven’t washed it in over 3 years, I hate washing it, as it takes ages to get a good smell back, Gross I know. Its falling to bits, originally it was a big blankey 1970’s style, the material is hard to describe, I lost one when I was younger and I was so upset, inconsolible, my nan then went to the bedroom and pulled a minture one with the same material out of the draw, she was saving it for my 21st hoping to embarrass me infront of friends and boyfriends, I’ve had this one ever since, my boyfriend doesn’t mind at all. My ex hated it tho and made me choose between him and my blanket, I pretended I threw it out but kept it at my parents house and whenever I used to go back I would always have a cuddle. Couldn’t be without it!
I am 15 years old. I still have my security blanket from when i was a baby. I call it my “geek” because i couldnt say “blankey” as a child. everyone in my family keeps telling me to get rid of it and my brother is always pretending to destroy it or threatning to, just to scare me-and boy does it work. i CAN sleep without it, but i have a hard time getting to sleep.its a crochet blanket. i like to make it cold either by leaving it in my wondow or putting it in the freezer, then feeling it and squeezing it. all my friends mock me about it, but they dont really mind it. when i dont have it i get nightmares too. it is naturally a whiteish color because it faded over time, but its gray because i hate washing it. i dont like the feel of it when it gets washed. i prefer to have its smell than the laundry soap. and i prefer to have it hard and gray than soft and white…when im sad i have to have it and if i dont have it when i go away overnight i end up crying. im obviously not ready to let it go yet…
I have a little diary with paper rose cut-outs – you know, those beautiful colourful cutouts called “scraps” – and other drawings of roses, postcards, poems written in “purple” prose – ornate, clean, self-consciously sensuous. It has so much sentimental value for me. Comfort object?
@Ashton exactly same thing!!
I’m 15 and still have my blanket. My parents have given up trying to get rid of it but my mum wants to wash it. (whenever she does I have yet another security blanket to replace it -_- ) I love the smell but get so annoyed when it smells of laundry products. I think it all started when I was about 4/5 when I still had dummies… My mum took them away and then i replaced them with the blankets and would take them everywhere…
I even took them to playschool with me :S
yeah.. Deffo not ready to let them go 🙂
I’m 17 a and I’ve had my blanket before I was even born as my mum bought it and while pregnant decorated it with flowers as it is white. I can’t sleep with out it and can’t think of ever letting it go although it been worn and tested for 17 years it goes everywhere with me has traveled overseas with me it has cryed with me and has always been there for me when no one eles was it’s my best friend it smells great and my attachment with is is unbelievable my siblings threaten to burn it ect but they know that would destroy me. My friends and boyfriend dont have a problem and I’m not embarrassed I love you blanky if I could I wOuld marry you lol
I’m sixteen and I still have my blanket, although i DO wash her regularly lol. I named her DC when I was about eight. Don’t ask why,I don’t remember. 🙂 My friends don’t make fun of me or anything. Definitely not ready to let go any time soon, though I do worry about when I’m older and sharing a bed… idk what will happen there lol…
Then again, I am really weird about my bed in general, like I really don’t like when other people sit or lay on it, so I don’t know how I’ll deal with sharing a bed at all.
I realize it sounds weird when I refer to my blanket as a ‘her’, but I just can’t bring myself to say ‘it’. And hey, I don’t lick her. 😉
I am 26….and I still have my blankey…I call it binky. I use to be embarrased that I loved it so much but then it became like common knowledge to pretty much everyone I knew, so it wasn’t a secret anymore. It’s the only thing I still have from my childhood.
My binkey’s nic name is Magic Binkey. I wash it about once every 2 weeks as I don’t use it daily anymore. Everyone in my family actually loves the binkey….because it’s magic. My family loveingly nic names it the sick blanket….because it’s been loaned out to whoever is sick to make them better, and it works.
It’s a quilt binky made up of 4′ by 4′ squares of baby blankets. It’s about the size of a single bed blanket. It used to be fluffy…but it’s very flat now, due to it being used often. It smells very sweet…like hugs and kisses. No matter what I wash it in, it always smells the same. I love my magic binkey.
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I stopped sleeping with it once I was in my 1st major relationship. I realized it was weird lol. It now stays in my home office on my lounger, but I’m in my office daily so…I see it daily lol.
I didn’t carry a comfort object from childhood into adulthood, but in recent years I’ve gone back to that behavior. Even though I’m a male, I find great pleasure in cuddling soft dolls, often while watching TV. I usually enjoy a security blanket while cuddling a doll. And just this morning, I discovered the singular pleasure of taking one of my doll’s caps and using it as a secondary object like the blanket. I hold it next to my right eye and finger the tassels on top of the cap. It feels wonderful! I might add that I suffered a lot of emotional trauma in early childhood.
I am 21 and i still actively sleep with my security blanket. I call it Stuffers because at one point in time it was the pillow case to my very old pillow that i still actively sleep with as well. Before Stuffers was Stinky.
As you can imagine, Stinky was very old and very…well…stinky. He was a quilted blanket that i had once owned since a very small child.i dragged it with me everywhere but eventually because of its physical state my mom became embarrassed and so she cut a small piece of it for me to take take on day trips. Eventually Stinky was completely lost through a cut here and a cut there until it had completely vanished. I grieved immensely.
Soon after i became attached to a pillow and since then i have been hooked. Stuffers is a feather pillow that, for a long time, was used with no pillow case until it began getting holes within the material. I had to patch him up and then cover him from further wear and tear or he would eventually disappear forever. Since then, his pillow case became worn, smelly, and so holey that it completely split in two from the seems. but i did not have the heart to throw it away so i kept it, converting it into a blanket. I can tell you that he is a horrific sight and that my pillow is holding up but the old pillow case is now in thin strips of fabric that i am forced to braid together and tie at the end to keep it form further tear. Sounds bizarre right? I only know that it has brought me great comfort.
I have always hated the smell of it being washed, and, to be honest, i dont think it could handle any washing in its state now. But judging on what i have seen on this sight, there are many people out there who feel the same way. I hadnt realized it until now but when i hold it and am not paying attention, I suck on my tongue and place it as close to my face as possible.
Im 23 and ive had a blanky my whole entire life. Actually…2, both with silk on the end. My first one was a pink blanket i had until i was about 8 or 9, then it became shredded as i took it everywhere i went. I couldnt sleep at night after they had to take it away, so my nannie gave me a big giant white blanket, also with silk on the ends. I cannot sleep without it. Well, i mean i can… but i have such a hard time going to sleep. My boyfriend doesnt mind it at all, so i guess thats a good thing. I do not let anyone at all touch it. I hate sharing it. If someone else was freezing, theres no way id let them use it… and no, im not at all a cruel person lol. I hate washing it because i ‘know’ at that point in time its not in my posession. I’m not sure ill never break the blanky habbit, not anytime soon. I rub my fingers, lips and tip of my nose on the silk at night and during the day while i cuddle with it, and thats normally what puts me to sleep. Actually, ive found that it has on occasion made me a little late for work. I will never ever get rid of this thing… i cant really explain how it makes me feel while im holding it. The silk is so soft, it almost puts me in a trance.
Wow I can totally relate to almost everyone here. I wanted to “google” what I do but had no idea how to verbalize it! I carried a “blankey” as a child and my mom told me at age 3 if I gave it up I wouldn’t have to take a nap anymore and be a “big girl”. That lasted one afternoon and I told her I would just have to have a nap because I wanted my blankey back! Now that I’m 32, my husband and kids call mine “wubber” and it’s basically a pillowcase. I just love the way it feels. Like Ambie, I rub it on my nose and around my mouth. My favorite thing to do is rub it around my fingernails. I’m not sure why I do this but I can’t go anywhere without it. I even carry it in my pocketbook! It calms me down and again, like Ambie says, it’s trance-like. I actually love to wash mine (even though I hate to be without it). I love the fresh clean smell. I’m so glad I found this site – I really thought I was weird!
ive had my security blanket all my life. it started as a blanket sheet with a bunny on, and it was in 2 halves. the very smaller half i kept which ended up to be a tiny rag. the other half was drowned in paint from a phsyco girl i was made to hang around with due to parents being friends. devo’ed! i then found some same material when i was about 11 and made a new one, and encapsulated the old one inside…
i still have ‘mr blanket’ and im 33!!! im aware how disgusting it is, and it never gets washed. i dont use it all the time now, my husband would hate it and freak out. its my dirty little secret indulgence. i like to rub it between my fingers and i like it when its cold as well, like to crush it n smell it?!!! i also like to rub it all over my nose and mouth. i defo go into a trance like state, and it just takes away all my stresses and makes me feel instantly better whatever has happened. its my absolute most treasured possession. i would be very depressed without it, its been though all my good and all my bad times. its been abroad, to festivals, to raves. everywhere, all though i havent taken it anywhere in the last few years, for fear of being found out, or worse-loosing it. when we go abroad, i hide it in the house incase we get burgled….not that anyone would want it, i just panic in case it got lost!!!
im actively encouraging my daughter to take up blanket loving, she 13 months old and coming upto the time where she will develop attachments. i have got her a cuski, and she even loves it now….
confessions of a blanket sniffer…..
I’m 12 but I’ll be 13 in a month and i still have my blankies (as i call them) i’ve had them since i was really little. My older sister always makes fun of me saying i’m a little baby. my mom always threatens to throw them away if i don’t do my chores or whatever. i’m like most of you where i don’t like to wash it because i like the smell but my family always calls them gross, they don’t understand. i can’t go to sleep without them and when i’m sad or upset i always grab them. i don’t carry them around with me during the day i keep them in my bed. but i’m afraid of how long i’ll have them, will i never be able to get rid of them? And also when i’m older and i share a bed with my boyfriend or husband what will they think. these comments helped me a lot, now i know i’m not the only older person that still has a blankie.
Ok…I have finally googled this and came up with this forum. I am 49 yrs old and can never remember not sleeping with my “blanky or Yay-Yay”. I hid it for years and always just made it with my bed as just another blanket. But finally on my third marriage I said forget it and told my husband as soon as we moved in together. My 2nd husband was very jealous of it, but my husband now just understands I need the comfort of it. Last year I finally gave in and bought a new blanky cause the old was just was falling apart (it’s still in the closet in case the new one has to be washed and I “need” it). It has alway has a satin edge and my mom tells me I use to say “yah-yah” when I rubbed it as a child hence the name. I use to carry a piece of satin ribbon around with me for years just for the comfort of touching it, when I could be home for the blanket comfort. It took me years to accept I need this comfort but with my daughter (who is 19) and my husband I sleep good everynite with my secutity blanket wrapped around me.
I’m a 19 year old male, and I sleep with a few stuffed animals. Two dolphins, two sharks and an iguana. At first I grew out of it at a young age, but got back into it in my teens after going through huge emotional stress at that time.
I have overwhelmingly strong emontional attachments to all of them. I even carry one with me every day. I tried letting go of them, but its just impossible. They effect my every day life now, and I love every second of it.
And I too have a security blanket(woobee). I am a 41 year old male with an 8 year old son, who now dose to have or need a woobee too. As far back as I can remember I have had one. The soft touch of it inbetween my fingers and aginst my face. It is a undescribable comforting feeling. Relaxing and soothing all at the same time. Kinda just puts me in the relaxing zone, no matter where or what I am doing. I knew that I was not the only one with this fetish if you will. I once saw an old old man (eighty at least) with his fingers rubbing his shirt sleve in a needing sort of way. He saw that I also had a woobee. At that point knew that it would be just fine for me as a little kid to have a woobee. I now know why Napoleon always had his hand inside his coat. You’ll never know for sure… I am not ashamed, and will always embrace it, and so should you. It makes you who you are.
I’m a 19 year old girl and I still have, every time I go to sleep, my childhood doll right next to me. I don’t know if other people have this with theirs, but mine has “the smell” without which sleep time isn’t sleep time :)She’s practically as old as me, so she;s getting pretty terrible looking from how much she’s been played and cuddled with, but I’m certain I’ll never be able to get rid of her – while I can physically sleep without her, there’s something of the irreplaceable about a childhood naptime cuddle-thing 🙂
I’m a 19-year-old female, I’ve had my blanky since I was 2-years-old. It’s been ripped and torn and new pieces added to it and re-patched. Right now it’s a pretty big mess but I wouldn’t give it up for the world. Right now for example it’s wrapped around my neck so I can rub my chin on the soft side. My family always teases me about it but I don’t care. They say it smells (probably does, doesn’t get washed much teehee) but I don’t notice. My boyfriend even gets a little jealous and tries to sleep with it. I always have it wrapped around my eyes at night, and take it pretty much anywhere I’m going to be sleeping. I freak out if I can’t find it, “MOM WHERE’S MY BLANKY!?!?!” Haha, I love it like family. It’s my best friend <3 :).
Okay, I admit, I am a 32 year old mom with a serious blanket/thumb sucking habit. I have come to the conclusion that my thumb sucking is really just a side product of the addiction to my “geegee”. I have also come to the conclusion that the attachment to my pheromone ridden and most likely bed bug infested blanket, has more to do with it’s smell and texture than any security it provides. Most of the time it instantly puts me in a trance like state of relaxation or meditation, however there are times when I realize that I crave it’s smell alone, not the sedated state it can put me in. Similar to a chocolate craving, or salt, or whatever one might crave to the point that they can barely stand it until they satisfy that craving. Now that seems to be an issue or at least that is where I find that it must be a negative dependancy. Don’t get me wrong, I function well day to day but it bothers me that I can need, want, crave, something so much. Why do I not have the control? Why do I stiiiilllll have this behavior?
I can’t tell you all how happy this makes me!!!! I am a 37 year old female who (till now) thought I was strange & suffering from some sort of ailment. I have my blanket stuffed into a pillow case (so no one sees it) on my bed & I find it very hard to sleep without it. It is as old as I am, my aunt crochet it when I was born. I sniff it & squeeze it & as soon as I touch it my tounge flips back & suck my tounge almost uncontrollably. My boyfriend doesn’t mind it but my family makes fun of me, however, I couldn’t care less, I’ll admit its old ratty & falling apart but it sniffs the same as the day it was made. I bring it on vacation & it must be in my carry on so if the plane goes down I can sniff my way out of this life. Or if I survive, it will too.
I also just want to add that I am proud to be addicted to sniffing my blanket, there are many worse things to be addicted to.
I’m a 28-year old male and I still sleep with a security blanket. Just like everyone on here said, it’s incredibly soothing. I can sleep without it, but I choose not to. I keep it stashed under my pillow. I went without it for a few years in college (not the type of thing you want to show up with in the dorm on the first day), but I brought it back with me at some point. I guess I was a little embarrassed about it, but my roommates didn’t care. My ex-girlfriends liked it and would even want to share it, which was ok with me.
I wash it and I don’t put it in my mouth.
Hi
I’m 43 years young and have had my yellow sniffy blanket for about 20 years now (I think it was a blue blanket before that). My mum made it and it has a satin edge. I fold over the top couple of inches so the satin goes on my lips and the start of the cloth on the tip of my nose. Also grap a handful of it and tickle my tummy! Like others have said, it loses its ‘flavour’ when washed. Only small pieces are left now.
I’m also starting on a ‘new’ blanket. Its one my wife took from a hotel where she worked and is meant to be a cot blanket I think – white, honeycomb cellular with satin edges top and bottom. Hasn’t got the flavour of my last one but at least it stays in position!
I can’t tell you how relieved I am to know that other adults still find comfort in their blankies. I’m 56. I’ve been ashamed all my life and have told no one about it – even my therapist and two husbands. Early in those marriages, I forced myself to cope without it, but eventually cut pieces from it so that I could hide one under the mattress for easy access while they slept. I’m sure I was “discovered” as I would fall asleep with it, and then panic in the morning if I couldn’t find it. They never said anything though. My first blanket was made of pink wool. Over time it deteriorated (I guess I loved it to death). I literally had tiny pieces, even threads, to smell, suck like a baby as on my mother’s nipple, run through my fingers and rub on my body. Miraculously, I was able to replace it with half an old wool blanket, from the same era, which I found in my dad’s garage. Perhaps it was used as a rag. Nevertheless,I washed it and became accustomed to its smell. Now that I live on my own, I can “cuddle” it while watching tv. If anyone knew about it, especially at my age, I’d be humiliated. I’ve often considered telling my therapist, since she knows everything else, but it seems so weird and I’ve believed it was a major psychological deficit. After all these years, I’ve finally found some comfort in your honesty. Thank you. (But it’s still my BIG secret.)
I am also 56 and have a security blanket. It is pink and soft. it is comforting to me.It makes me feel secure.
Hi there, it’s great to find so many people like me who have a “sniffy”. I am 43 years old and have had a Sniffy all my life. It started with me as a baby my mum said that I never took to sucking my thumb, but would sniff the sleeve of my cardigan and when I got my first dressing gown, I sniffed the sleeve. I also named my sniffy ‘Smithers’ I have no idea why I gave him that name, it just suited him. Over the years the various Smithers would wear out, so when I was 14 I had a thin small duvet, I cut it in half, rolled it up like a tube, sewed it together, made a lovely cover for it with a nice flowery sheet which was made out of a nice soft cotton and nice to sniff through, it’s important to get the right material. The end of it which I sniff gets worn out and has to be replaced, but alas, I’m on my last piece of the sheet that I originally used, so will have to find some as good. My family always said “are you going to sit there at 50 still sniffing that” and do you know what, of course I am!
I will NEVER get rid of Smithers. Like the other posts on here I hate washing him I like it when he’s grubby, but eventually do have to. There’s no shame in having a sniffy just the same as there’s no shame in sucking your thumb, it’s not hurting anyone. One of my friends is the same age as me and still sucks her thumb.
If I ever tell people about it they are always ok, and even sometimes say that they know other people who still have them, so it’s not that rare.
So enjoy your sniffys, cos Smithers will be with me forever.
I am a 26 year old male who sleeps with both a security blanket and a teddy bear. With that said I would like to state that I even still tell my teddy how much I love him from time to time(I grew up an only child) but I don’t absolutely need either of them to sleep but it sure helps because I’m a self diagnosed insomniac. I of course don’t drink beer with the buddies and hold teddy watching the game BUT I have found in every relationship I’ve been in when I surprise the girl on the couch with my blanket and teddy bear she sees the affectionate side of me right away. I am a pretty intimidating person to meet, usually have an expressionless face and I make no effort to get to know the person unless I get the right gut feeling about them, sometimes its right away sometimes it takes years….
So next comes my teenage years which I learned more about life than most people do in their own life, running drugs with certain family at such a critical stage in self-development has obviously effected who I am, seeing dope heads smoking the shit in front of their children, seeing how skinny the kids are because the junkies always feed their habit. I learned life isn’t always sunny and you should be thankful for every happy moment you have or make someone else have and yet the mass majority of society who is well off enough to have some breathing room won’t even manage a thank you for holding a door open. My question to anyone who has read all this is, can you piece my story together better than myself? I want to know your thoughts on the little bit of my true self I have shared with you. Much thanks for reading and please don’t hold back with your opinion.
I had a car I bonded with, just as the article mentions. I bought it in 1994 and finally sold it in 2010. The people I sold it to totalled it within 3 months, and upon hearing the news, I swear I felt like crying.
However, more recently, I have begun to worry that I may have become too emotionally attached to my house, which I bought 10 years ago. I gave up a job in 2006 after only 8 months, just so I could move back to the town in which my house is located (I had not even put it on the market), and I am beginning to fear that this attachment to the house is keeping me from expanding myself in my career. I found this story as I was google searching “over-attachment”.
I’m 31 and I still have my blankie too. I call it binky. It was made for me by my great-grandmother. I’ve never been without it. I don’t sleep with it anymore (my significant other won’t let me), but I keep it in the bottom drawer of my nightstand, so I can touch it before I fall asleep. I often fall asleep with my hand in the drawer. I can’t imagine giving it up!
My yellow blanket was a wedding present from my mom’s friend in 1958. I was brought home from the hospital in it. I am 41. I have slept under it my entire life. My cat prefers it to anything. It has been problematic in relationships with the opposite sex, but, when explained, it seems to strike a chord. I feel like Linus, but for the strangest reason, it makes me feel safe and I really don’t care at this point. It has been mended dozens of times, but is otherwise intact. I love yellow blankey.
This is such an obvious problem. It seems everyone here falls into the category of, smoking is harmless. I’m 80 and I don’t have cancer.
Someone might be ‘ok’ but most of the time it’s a signal that the person has NOT learned proper coping mechanisms. Not having proper coping mechanisms can lead to all kinds of destructive behaviors on the journey to cope with life.
I’m not saying everyone who needs a security object is going to be a heroine addict, but I guarantee you the heroine addict has, amongst other problems, a lack of coping mechanisms.
well i posted on here. I’m happily married, have 2 beautiful kids, a great business and am one of the most together people i know. i cope perfectly in my life and am happy and positive and have no deep rooted physcolgical issues or troubles. so i would have to disagree with you and you obviously have no idea what you are talking about. i don’t drink except on occasions, i don’t smoke, and i only did acid when i was a teenager, and have never felt remotely depressed or like i would never cope….sorry i think you have it wrong this time pal…!
I don’t disagree with you in general, but do not agree that a security blanket indicates a DANGEROUS lack of coping mechanisms, I was emotionally and psychologically abused as a child, and had a homemade stuffed toy that substituted for the emotional connection I was missing. I gave it up in my early twenties when I got married but a recent diagnosis of depression and a period of severe stress actually made me make myself a new one (I still have the last one I had but it is quite disgusting).
I receive a level of emotional comfort and stress relief at the moment just by having this toy with me, and it is helping me get through a tough time. My husband understands the calming effect of it and seems okay with it.
So yes, I didn’t learn the appropriate coping mechanisms as a child. But the toy/blanky makes up for the deficit and probably is stopping me from becoming a complete basket case. So I think I have organised a substitute coping mechanism. Not ideal but far nicer and cheaper than years of therapy.
I am 24. My blanket was a baby shower gift, so I’ve had my blanket “with me” since before my birth. Its soo soft, and i, just like the others who have commented before me love its smell. I do wash it regularly but do prefer the prewash smell better. I get regular teasing from my family, but it makes me feel safe and comforted when i have my blanket with me. When i was little i used to call it my, “Green coviha” translation, green blanket.You see its the prettiest shade of mint green:). My mom was always sickly and would often have to travel far to see her doctors, and was left at home in the care of my older brothers and sisters, and missed her slot. But had the comfort of my blanket. I think its so important to me because its my “constent” and i don’t like to show my emotions, so when i do cry, etc its usually in the comfort of my room where my “constant” always is to give me comfort without judgment.
I am 19 and still have my security blanket. It’s almost like a member of my family… but not quite the same. It’s really difficult to describe. It’s almost impossible to imagine my life without it.
Mine is a fairly large pile of fabric, I call them my ‘nighties’ because the first, which I declared ownership of at the age of 1, one was a nightie belonging to my mother.
Like most others here, smell and feel are a big part of it for me. I also put mine over my fingers and scratch them and have done my whole life. Also,as embarrassing as this is, I talk to them. But I talk to all inanimate objects, so I figure it’s not as bad as it sounds!
It was such a relief finding this page – I have been worrying so much that I was going insane and had some serious, deep seated issues that needed to be addressed.
The lovey is a beautiful thing…but its loss is a necessary evil. Obviously this post is IMHO- so here goes my comment
I am 32. My DH is 36.
My husband is ‘Linus’ from Peanuts. While many younger readers won’t understand that reference I mean to say that my husband is smart and tall and handsome and well adjusted…except for his ‘blankie’.
He gets weird attachments to comforters. No one ever made him put his lovey away. It never “got lost” or got so destroyed it needed disposal.
He is one of the rare cases in which sociocultural norms did not discourage his blankie use. Broken home + abusive father equated to low self esteem – so there were few friends and thus there was no social pressure to encourage his detachment from the rectangular poly-cotton blend of fabric.
We got into a fight this evening because its night time and 60° outside and the windows are open but he was all sweaty and cranky because he was covered with a giant heavy winter duvet that he refuses to put into storage for the summer.
He is a wonderful husband and father. I’ve read lots of blogs devoted to relational issues and his issues are most certainly NOT as problematic as lots of other wives encounter. He does laundry and washes dishes, he thinks I’m hot after 7 years/two kids/and the 60lbs my thyroid goiter has helped me keep.
BUT his lovey attachment is much like one to a ratty old recliner that gets put in a man cave…except I’m on the couch while he and his giant heavy winter duvet hog the bed.
Our culture is not designed to tolerate the perpetual use of a lovey unless that attachment is transferred to a (socially deemed) appropriate object such as a lazy boy recliner (For men).
As for me- my blankie lovey got “lost” when I was seven and I remember feeling the safety and security of the attachment which has only been mirrored by how I feel when my DD’s ages 4 and 7 come into my room to snuggle on weekend mornings.
The point is that the ‘lovey’ level of attachment is healthy and helps make social connections but it can also be a crutch and cause social development interruption if not appropriatly mitigated.
I firmly believe that the lovey’s purpose is to teach the feelinng of safety and security BUT it needs to make its exit at an age or developmentally appropriate time to encourage bonding relationship building with people
Not things
My goodness. I feel like I don’t even need to say or describe anything because of how much I parallel to the comments that I read. I didn’t read them all–that’s a lot to read while I’m packing for a trip–but I read the first cluster for now and am glad to see I’m not the only one. Heck, I never knew the word for the ‘tongue thing’ until I happened upon those comments! XD
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I’ve liked stuffed animals and had a blanket for as long as I can remember. When we moved into a new house with my step dad (I’m age 15, btw) was when my mom and him started badgering me about “growing up” and not sleeping with, or at least not taking to places, a blanket and stuffed animal. But I don’t care, I do anyway! (Though their comments hurt, or at least bother) XD why should I care what someone thinks? If they don’t like it/me, they don’t have to associate with me. Lovely how simple that is, isn’t it? Besides, their badgering just makes me paranoid, until I see all the stuff online about people who do, too. Like now. I’m going on a school trip during which I have to room with older girls I’m not friends with, and my mom and step dad’s “advising” jarred me. I’ve researched whether others sleep with a stuffed animal and/or blanket before, and the badgering drove me to do it again :/.
It’s annoying how most people don’t know how common it really is. Or at least my mom and step dad don’t know. My step dad used to mess with me and hide my blanket, which would scare the heck outa me o.o. And when I lost my first blanket on a vacation i got sooo upset…and ended up attached to another :P. And apparently my fave stuffed animal from my childhood originally belonged to my sis (I’ve been told I pretty much took it) and when she had a daughter she badgered me and eventually took it suddenly from me :(. A while after that was horrible. That first night, oh god. But I sleep with another one of mine now, so…
Idk, I can’t really imagine not having them. I can’t quite explain it either, beyond “I’ve always done it.” I can sleep without them, just prefer not to. I just really like the feel of the blanket. And now that I’ve seen others say it, I’ll admit I admire the scent too XD. And a huggable stuffed animal is an awesome thing to an extrovert animal lover in an ambivert area XD. They’ve like that/those one constant, you know? And if it doesn’t hurt or grievously hinder me or anyone else I see no problem.
I’m a 24, almost 25!, year old woman and I still have my baby blanket from when I was a baby. It’s a precious moments blanket, made in 1987. I call it my blankie (so original right lol). It’s so soft and still in very great condition for an old blanket lol all these comments on here make me so happy that I’m not alone with this habit/attachment. I’m definitely not embarrassed one bit about having one, and I will not be giving it up anytime in my life lol I love coming home to it after a long day, and just cuddling it, sniffing it and doing this weird thing with my fingers to it. Like, I take a folded part between my fingers and fold it again to make a point. I then rub my pointer finger over it while still holding the point, and then when it’s not pointy anymore, I squish the point between my pointer and thumb. Then I just continue down the row or in a colder part of the blanket. It’s hard to explain, but I like to make the hardest point to rub. Sometimes if it’s a really good point, I’ll rub it on my lips and face. I don’t know, it just feels so nice. Plus the smell is what gets me so relaxed. At night, I’ll wrap it around my neck so I can smell it anytime I want. My boyfriend doesn’t mind it at all and our 5 (almost 6!) year old daughter has her own blanket too. She likes to scratch hers at one particular corner. It’s so cute because she says she’s ‘practicing scratching’ lol we both like to sniff each other’s blankets and sleep together with them. I don’t know, I feel as though nothing is wrong that we have these attachments of these blankets. It just makes us feel good. =]
Along with my husband and my children my Hankies are my most treasured processions, I’m 46 years old and having been sniffing and sucking my tongue since I was six months old, I feel no shame and have neither hidden it, it started with the flannelette sheet on my cot and I progressed to cotton hankies when the sheet eventually ran out, I’ve always been so grateful that my parents didn’t really try to break me from my habit,I agreed not to take it to school, instead I would sniff the cuff or collar of my jumper, no one ever questioned me.My hankies are always with me, I do leave them in the car whilst I’m at work and luckily I’m on my feet all day as if I have a sit down job I would struggle without them, I have about 10 hankies on the go all at different stages of worn in, some are smaller and softer than others, I do wash them every couple of days as I do like the fresh smell of them and I rotate them through my hands as I like the colder ones best, hate to lose any, my husband is always so pleased when he finds a lost one and I often catch him watching me, over the years he’s learnt to tell how tired I am by how much I’m sucking my tongue, the kids have grown up with it and have had to explain a few times to friends that I’m not poorly just got an odd habit, I’m not embarrassed by it and apart from work one or two are always with me and any situation were I’m sitting down I will also be sniffing my hankies, I honestly believe I’m a more relaxed and contented person Because of my habit,and when I see a child with there blankie I will always tell them that i still do this and we all belong to a very special club.
Hi, Im 23 I still have my bankey too. Its nicknamed ‘sucky sheet’ lol. My family named it this and it has stuck ever since really. I have used a sheet since i was about 2 my mu said I never had a dummy or anything she just came in one day and i was sucking on the corner of my pillow case and since then i will not stop. I do not have a particular blanket or sheet i use something soft a pillow case pj top something i like the feel of. I will suck on the corners of whatever i have and smell and rub my nose with it. My partner hates it he is a very light sleeper and he says he can hear me chewing in the night and stuff and keeps him awake. I hate when it gets washed. I have no shame of it really but if it is mentioned by my family I get upset and defensive about it. I just feel that I do not want to grow up and have kids and Im still doing this. I feel i need help to stop but i CANT!!…
I’m so glad I found this I thought I had issue, I’m a 20 year old male and I have a security item if I dot have it when I sleep inhale anxiety attacks and night tterror it’s on old sweater that belongs to my best friend although she hasn’t had it back in many years is this considered attachment issues or emotional dependency or is this moderately normal back story we met in a mental care facilities and she always came to my room and laid with me so I could sleep we were just kids so the nurses didn’t say anything m doc flipped though so then she couldn’t but her sweater helped so she gave it to me
I’m so relieved to see so many others like me. I’m 42 and have 2 woobies. One to sleep with and one for the living room. Have had one as long as i can remember. I sucked my thumb only if i had my woobie. My mom tried a few things to get me to stop sucking my thumb, but i knew it only happened with my woobie and i wasn’t about to tell her. Eventually I quit sucking my thumb but always had a woobie. Over the years it’s been replaced countless times. It has to be the perfect “silkies”. At stores i open all the blanket bags to feel for just the right material. A lot of fakes out there. The best ones are the small baby blankets made entirely of the perfect
silkies. I fold the edges evenly and rub my fingers in the folds which have to be perfectly spaced. I rub till the silkies till it gets warm and move to the cold area. It has to be cold. And i hate when it starts to smell. Hate it. When the sikies start to pill or just lose the silkiness i replace it. It’s all about the cool smoothness. I can’t say it puts me in a trance or anything like that. Feels like just a lifelong habit and i really don’t know what i get out of it. I just like it and do it all the time while at home. Does a bad childhood have anything to do with this? Any common threads between those of us with woobies? I’m curious.
I have 2 baby blankets (Riegel hospital receiving blankets) from when I was a newborn. I don’t sleep with them, but I do have them in the room with me, along with a bag of stuffed animals I have. I’m 23.
I still have a security blanket. I received my first one when I was three months old. I gave it a name, needed it to sleep. To me it is a living thing that comforts me and watches over me while i sleep. By the time I was 25 my blankie was small pieces. I have saved and put away the pieces and had my grandmother remake me a new one with fabric that felt just like my first blanket. I’m contented with this blanket I need it to sleep, but it will never be “pinkie” my first bedtime guardian. My new blanket feels and comforts me just like the first and nobody can touch it but me, I still haven’t given it a name like I did my first blanket. Had this blanket six yrs and counting. Glad I could let go and except a new blanket, it just had to feel the same to the touch.
I’m 14, I have a blankie that I always called “White Blankie”, it’s white and now bears a pink blankie to cover up the tearing on the back of it. I do not quite know what kind of fabric it is, and I’ve been told by my family that they don’t know of any blanket with the same fabric… It’s more of a sentimental attachment I have with it, and by now has lost the comforting chill and soft peach fuzz it once had, and the sweet smells that would put me to sleep at night.
But still I keep it because I feel terrified by the idea of not ever finding another blankie like it to simulate those good times.
Although, I can sleep without it but I’m ridiculously prone to nightmares and have to either have it or my cat with me to keep me from waking up mentally scarred.
Seriously though, I can remember most of my nightmares from back when I was four atleast. I don’t know where my mind even gets the ideas it has, but it’s nasty.
Hi, I’m a 14 year old female. I have had my clothees since I was about 9 months and CANNOT live without them. I worry about going to University and other people’s point of views towards my clothee. i received my clothee from my Dad when my parents divorced and i was visiting his house for the weekend. Conclusively i was leaving my mum on a weekend and missed the reassurement of having her by my side. Therefore, my dad brainstormed the idea of me taking a ripped piece of my Mum’s nighty. It is a silk material and I call it clothees, I store numerous numbers and unfortunately cannot stop adding to my collection.
I fear my Mum washing it, it takes the homely smell away, the laundry powder isn’t soothing. Certain friends are aware of the fact I have clothee’s , however this is only because of how it planned out. i wish this had happened with all of my friends yet i keep putting off telling some of my closest friends, although i know deep down I should just tell them. there’s just a constant reminder that they may tell others or judge. One of my closest friends sucks their thumb and another has a blanky. In a way it connects us and reassures us that we are not alone in this situation.
I get a soothing pleasure from running my fingers through the silk whilst rubbing my face with the other end. i agree, it kind of sends me into a trance, it is indescribable and you wouldn’t understand how comforting it is at any time in the day/night. Shockingly it is not just clothees that i am attached to, I like the feeling of a soft material like a PJ top or tracksuit bottoms on my skin (especially mouth).
I fear that i could never grow out of this attachment and find it comforting to talk about it. It reassures me that hopefully one day i will be able to act normal with my clothee around at the same time. I’ve never shared a bed with a boy before and this scares me as they may laugh/judge and it may be off-putting for them as it’s not a normal trait. I really want to get rid of this attachment as it is not nice when meeting new people and the thought of my clothee is always in the back of my mind. i’m improving with time as I used to carry around a soft toy too, however I have now grown out of the soft toy and pray this happens with my clothees.
It has been relieving to get this off my chest and share my story to fellow comfort blanket holders. Please don’t hesitate to reply and give advice on how to get rid of my clothee, it would be greatly appreciated.
thanks 🙂
Thanks
I dont know if anyone is still reading this thread….but..if youre worried about the laundry smell by washing your blanket..dont worry, use baking soda(in the washing powder drawer) and/or apple cider vinegar (inside the machine with the blanket in a small platic cup). It is 100% natural and allergen free and will only remove odor and leave absolutely no nasty fragrance. ENJOY THIS INFO 😉
(BTW im 30, still have blanket in good condition despite colour fading)
I’m 22 and female. I’ve had my blankie since birth, it was my older brothers originally, brought by my nan for when he was born. but my mum convinced him to trade it for bambi DVD when I arrived. So it’s actually 25 years old.
I just call him blankie (but i always refer to it as it was a boy (him/he)) tho my boyfriend refers to him as fankinblankie because of how many times I’ve had to mend him lol.
A lot of people who’s comments I’ve read seem to have silk or satin feeling blankies but mines just cotton, it used to have the alphabet printed on it but now thats faded. Apart from some colour in the creases that I still look at every now and then. I cuddle it every night and sniff it to fall asleep. He gets washed every 2 months or so and my boyfriend doesn’t mind it and even naps with it himself and he agrees with me that blankie does smell like sleep 🙂
My dad wanted me to get rid of it as I got older even saying “how are you gunna sleep with a blankie everynight when you have a boyfriend” but I just always thought if they love me then they’ll love blankie too. So I’ve never felt the need to hide it.
He comes with me if I ever sleep away from home and if I’m feeling sad or unwell then I carry my blankie all round the house with me. I’m glad to hear so many other people who have a blankie or a teddy that they just can’t be without and I don’t think anyone should ever have to hide it. Be proud blankie lovers 😀 xxx
I’m 46 and I still have what’s left of my blanket from my crib days. It’s nice to know that it’s ok
I am 58 and had a blankies when I was a child but my parents took it away from me when it got tattered….my security was the feel of the edge of the blankie when I ran it through my fingernails…I have had bedsheets that soothed me…and often go a long while until I get that certain sheet that feels good…lately I bought a pair of shorts that has that feel at the hem and they are my favourite shorts now…
I’m 36 and I have a blanket too. I can sleep without but I rarely choose to do that. I’ve had several blankets but the current one I’ve had since I was 15. I love to feel it on my face and sniff it. It give me comfort and peace no matter what’s going on in my life. It’s on its last leg and I’m trying to figure out if I’m going to get another one or try to let it out.
My Best Friends jacket is a huge comfort to me when I’m not with her. I’m 26 and sleep with it every night if I don’t I can’t fall asleep. I love the smell of it and don’t think I would ever wash it
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