Few Answers Archives - World of Psychology

Perhaps Why Tiger Woods Cheats While more details of the Tiger Woods scandal continuing to emerge, the inevitable question arises — Why would such a successful, attractive man cheat on his wife and family? Why, in general, do men — and women — cheat? And why would Tiger Woods, one of the most successful professional golfers of all time, cheat on his wife, Elin Nordegren?

Psychological research has examined this question and has a few answers.

Infidelity occurs for numerous reasons, ranging from personality factors (Orzeck & Lung, 2005) to evolution-based theories about how extra-partner relationships are natural while monogamy is unnatural (Barash & Lipton, 2001). It’s not surprising to find personality factors may influence cheating behavior, because people who are more similar in personality are less likely to have interpersonal conflict. Among other findings, Orzek & Lung (2005) found that “cheaters see themselves as more social and active compared to their partners and non-cheaters. Additionally, Extroverts may be inclined to cheat to obtain stimulation and prevent boredom. […] Non-cheaters perceived their monogamous partners as significantly higher on Extroversion, compared to the cheaters’ perception of their monogamous partner. It may be important for one partner to be more extroverted in the eyes of each partner and for oneself to be less extroverted in order to prevent cheating.”

“The findings in this study support the idea that cheaters may seek out more stable partners if they perceive their monogamous partners as being less psychologically adjusted than they are […] and suggest that cheaters may perceive themselves as having stronger intellect and stronger creativity compared to that of their partners, leading them to seek out partners that may be a better, that is, similar, match.”

If happiness is found in our similarity to another person (at least through the eyes of personality), then cheating is an effort to seek out increased compatibility in another partner.

Infidelity isn’t purely sexual, either — a person can cheat on another through emotional infidelity as well. Men tend to display relatively greater distress in response to sexual, physical infidelity by their partner, whereas women tend to display relatively greater distress in response to emotional infidelity by their partner.

Other research shows that both men and women lie in relationships about infidelity, even though men reported more infidelity than women do (36% versus 21%, Stebleton & Rothenberger, 1993). And Corey (1989) suggests that sex is not the primary motivator for most affairs; a problematic relationship is. Adulterers cheat rather than face and resolve these problems.

A recent study of sexual dysfunction and infidelity from Italian researchers (Fisher et al., 2009) sheds additional light on characteristics associated with men who cheat. In a study of 2,592 heterosexual men who had sexual dysfunction, they found that infidelity was associated with relationship problems in their long-term relationship or marriage (especially if the man had a stable, secondary relationship with another woman). Men in the study who had extramarital affairs had higher stress at work, a longer primary relationship span, and higher risk of conflicts within the primal couple and within the family. In addition, the researchers found men who cheated were more likely to have a partner who had an illness or very low sexual desire. Men who cheated in this study were also found less likely to have low sexual desire, and had lower feelings of guilt about masturbation.

The precursors to cheat could be summarized as:

Significant, ongoing, unresolved problems in the primary, long-term relationship or marriage
A significant difference in sex drive between the two partners
The older the primary relationship
A greater difference in personality than perhaps the partners realize
And to a far lesser extent, perhaps some theoretical, evolutionary remnants that may have reinforced multiple partners over monogamy (although this is just a hypothetical argument that would be difficult to disprove)

A good, healthy relationship means understanding one another, including one’s sexual needs. In this way, men and women are not so different. Some women prefer romance, but guess what — so do some men. None of these types of generalizations are of any use until you understand the person (not the object) you are in a relationship with. That’s done through simple communication — sit down and talk about your sexual needs with your partner.

An unhealthy relationship that lacks real communication and is on auto-pilot is at risk for a cheating partner. Especially if problems are present in the relationship that are not being realistically addressed in a timely manner (e.g., through couple’s counseling or marriage therapy). Relationships don’t cure themselves — it takes the resolve and commitment of both people in order to make it work.

Why Tiger Woods cheated will likely remain a mystery for some time, until he chooses to share his own personal motivations. But if he’s like most men who cheat, he likely did so because of dissatisfaction with his marriage, a difference in sex drive between him and his spouse, and perhaps greater personality differences between he and his spouse that either of them realize.

References:

Barash, D.P. & Lipton, J.E. (2001). The myth of monogamy: Fidelity and infidelity in animals and people. New York, NY: W H Freeman/Times Books/ Henry Holt & Co.

Corey, M.A. (1989). Why Men Cheat: Psychological Profiles of the Adulterous Male. Springfield, IL, England: Charles C Thomas.

Fisher, A.D., Corona, G., Bandini, E., Mannucci, E., Lotti, F., Boddi, V., Forti, G., Maggi, M. (2009). Psychobiological correlates of extramarital affairs and differences between stable and occasional infidelity among men with sexual dysfunctions. Journal of Sexual Medicine, 6(3), 866-875.

Orzeck, T. & Lung, E. (2005). Big-Five Personality Differences of Cheaters and Non-Cheaters. Current Psychology: Developmental, Learning, Personality, Social, 24(4), 274-286.

Stebleton, M.J. & Rothenberger, J.H. (1993). Truth or consequences: Dishonesty in dating and HIV/AIDS-related issues in a college-age population. Journal of American College Health, 42(2), 51-54.

Why do we keep clinging to myths, even when research or other facts tell us the myths aren’t true? That’s the question posed by Newsweek’s Sarah Kliff, discussing a new book put out by Vreeman and Carroll, who blow away 66 new medical myths in their new book, Don’t Swallow Your Gum!

The research offers only a few answers as to why we keep believing things like we must drink 8 glasses of water a day (myth) and the belief that vitamin C helps cure the common cold (myth):

The body of research on belief formation is relatively sparse. One expert in the field, York University psychologist James Alcock, admits that it’s difficult to trace where beliefs start.

“Even as individuals we usually can’t explain where beliefs come from,” says Alcock, who is currently at work on a book about the psychology of belief. “Why should you drink eight glasses of water? People will say they heard it somewhere. Sometimes it’s impossible to trace the source, but it just gets repeated over and over.”

Some myths begin with a kernel of truth that gets misinterpreted, like the eight-glass theory. In 1945, the Food and Nutrition Board of the National Research Council stated that adults should take in about 2.5 liters of water a day and that most of this is contained in prepared foods. Ignore that last part of the recommendation and you’ve got the eight-glass mandate.[…]

So why do we do it? Something called “illusory correlation” may play a role:

Once we believe something, whether it’s truth or myth, we begin to see confirmation in the world around us. In psychology, Alcock explains, this is known as an illusory correlation: making connections between particular events that line up with our beliefs about the world.

I also think this ties in with something called “confirmation bias,” which suggests we only seek out information (or interpret information we find) that confirms our existing preconceptions about something. So if we hear “Drinking 8 glasses of water a day is a myth,” we’ll go look for something online that tells us otherwise (such as this article on the Mayo Clinic’s website that repeats the 8 glasses of water a day myth as an acceptable medical recommendation, despite admitting that the approach “isn’t supported by scientific evidence.” Which kind of begs the question — why list it on your medical website if there’s no evidence to support it?).

Getting back to Alcock’s explanation:

“We can become attached to beliefs that seem to serve a function for us,” Alcock explains, “and we don’t like to give them up even if they’re false because they seem too true to be false.” This is especially true when we get information from a trusted source. Since medical myths usually come from parents, doctors and media, it’s no surprise they’re particularly robust.

A while back, Alcock did an experiment with his students in illusory correlations. He told them all that redheads were particularly erratic drivers and to watch out on the road for them. Sure enough, his students came back reporting all sorts of stories of redheads gone wild on the road.

Alcock’s pointing out that once this misinformation is out there, it’s very difficult to change. Myths take on a life of their own and enter into the “common wisdom” of society.

What about the myth that sugar intake causes symptoms of ADHD?

Those illusory correlations seem particularly strong with one of the more controversial myths that Vreeman and Carroll debunked that sugar causes hyperactivity in children (it doesn’t). There’s a slew of double-blinded, randomized trials that have shown no connection between sugar consumption and a child’s increase in energy.

“For that one, anecdote seems to trump science,” says Carroll. “They don’t care how many good studies are out there, they’ve seen it happen with their child so they know it must be true.” Carroll suspects that parents will often associate situations with sugar a birthday party, for example with hyperactivity and immediately identify sugar as the culprit, rather than considering the other factors that could cause a burst in energy.

Again, it doesn’t help when websites such as WebMD suggest that “a child may become more active due to an adrenaline rush produced by this blood sugar spike” when answering the question “Does sugar cause symptoms of ADHD.” The real answer is simply, “No, there’s no proof that sugar is connected to symptoms of ADHD in children.” Instead of that being the first sentence in the answer, it’s the last sentence, clouding the clarity of our existing knowledge (and the actual answer).

What can be done about all of these medical myths that seem to continue to float around?

Medical myths usually stick around because no one’s on a public-health crusade to set the record straight. Of all the battles to pick in health care, chances are convincing Americans that they don’t need to have eight glasses of water is nowhere near a top priority.

True. Although a search of information on the web about the “8 glasses of water a day” myth seems to be busted by every mainstream website in the search results. That’s because when a website can write a news article that “busts” a myth, it can be very newsworthy in itself.

So one of the ways we can combat such myths isn’t by a public health crusade, per se’. It’s by simply reporting on studies as they are published, which can by itself provide some counterbalance to the myth.

Read the full article: Why We Cling to Outdated Medical Myths

Few Answers

Perhaps Why Tiger Woods Cheats

Why We Believe Medical Myths