Tag:

Psychotherapist

5 Sure Signs It’s Time to See a Therapist

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 10/30/2024

Psychotherapy is a wonderful treatment for many of life’s problems, with thousands of studies backing up its use as an evidence-based treatment. But sometimes a person doesn’t know when to go see a therapist. How bad should you let things get before you seek out help?

Psychologists know a secret that the research has shown — and one that I’ll share here with you. The sooner you seek out treatment, the faster you’ll feel better. It may sound obvious, but far too often people let their problems overwhelm them before getting help.

So here are 5 sure signs that it may be time to see a therapist.

10/30/2024 6 comments

3 Tips to Remember for Your First Therapy Session

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 10/13/2024

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

Seeing a therapist for the first time can be anxiety-provoking. I’m not sure anybody looks forward to it.

Not only do you have to share information about your problem, but also the basics about your life — your family, your background, your relationships and more. With a stranger, no less.

Then, imagine that the first therapist you go to see isn’t the right fit for you. You’re expected to do this all over again — maybe more than twice.

This process isn’t easy, but these three things might help smooth the way a bit.

10/13/2024 10 comments

Bruce Springsteen’s Depression

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 4/14/2024

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

Bruce Springsteen Depression Bruce Springsteen suffered from depression, according to a new, lengthy article in the latest edition of The New Yorker. While previously he’s disclosed his on-again, off-again battle with depression to biographer and friend, Dave Marsh, this is the first time it’s been discussed at some length.

Writer David Remnick interviews many Bruce Springsteen confidantes for the article, including his wife Patti Scialfa. In the article, we learn more about Springsteen’s battle with depression — even to the point of having some suicidal thoughts 30 years ago.

It’s an interesting interview, but you need a good 30 or 40 minutes to read the entire thing. Not being a particular Springsteen fan, I learned a lot about him. It turned him from being “Oh, he’s just one of those rock superstars” to “Oh, he’s a guy who really had to fight, scratch and battle his way up not only in his career, but in his life too.”

I have a lot more respect for him now — and am glad he was successful in battling his depression.

4/14/2024 0 comment

Hard to Find a Male Therapist?

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 11/12/2023

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

Hard to Find a Male Therapist Well, yes. Fewer men are choosing clinical psychology as a profession.

We’ve known this for many years, as graduate programs in psychology — both Master’s level and doctoral — have increasingly become female-dominated. In my graduate class of 1990, over 75% of the class was female. That percentage has only increased in the past two decades.

So Benedict Carey’s new article in the New York Times is a bit of a puzzler. The angle is that because of this gender discrepancy, a good male therapist is increasingly becoming difficult to find:

Researchers began tracking the “feminization” of mental health care more than a generation ago, when women started to outnumber men in fields like psychology and counseling. Today the takeover is almost complete.

And I say, “So what?”

11/12/2023 12 comments

Yelp and Therapist Reviews

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 10/18/2023

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

Yelp and Therapist Reviews Should you be able to review your psychotherapist on Yelp?

That’s the question psychologist Keely Kolmes asks in The New York Times the other day, and the answer is — yes, but.

There’s certainly nothing wrong with the idea behind having public reviews of health care professionals, including psychologists and therapists. But as Dr. Kolmes notes, what makes sense for a housekeeper, plumber or restaurant review becomes a bit difficult when dealing with confidential health information — which includes a person’s relationship with a therapist.

A psychotherapy relationship is a very unique relationship. A person can have a bad therapy experience with a perfectly good therapist, and vice-a-versa. The current set of review websites, like Yelp, really aren’t very good when it comes to understanding the unique and complex relationship people have with their therapist.

10/18/2023 40 comments

6 Signs It’s Time to Dump Your Therapist

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 10/16/2023

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

6 Signs It's Time to Dump Your Therapist Sometimes a therapist just isn’t that into you. After all, a psychotherapy relationship isn’t just about teaching cognitive-behavioral therapy techniques, or analyzing dreams. It’s about a human connection between two people — one person in need, and the other person who is there to act as a wise guide, teacher, and supporter through a process of change.

Most therapists are pretty good at what they do. But even a good therapist may not always be the right fit for you. It’s similar to when you interview for a job where you feel like your resume is a perfect fit for the company, yet you don’t get the job. Perhaps the interview didn’t go as well as you thought, because the employer isn’t just looking for the best candidate — they’re looking for the person who will be the best fit for the team at the company.

Therapists aren’t always self-aware enough to acknowledge that sometimes they may see a client who isn’t the best fit for them (and bad therapists will never acknowledge such a thing). Hey, they’re human and sometimes they miss their own signs.

So here are five sure signs that it may be time to dump your therapist, and find one where the fit is better.

10/16/2023 99 comments

Why Doctors Oversell Benefits, Undersell Risks and Side Effects

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 9/16/2023

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

Why Doctors Oversell Benefits, Undersell Risks and Side Effects Virtually across the board of medicine and psychiatry, doctors will constantly and consistently oversell the benefits of a given treatment, and undersell the risks and side effects of it. This may not be as surprising when you look at some of the key factors into how medical and psychiatric treatment is learned and then conducted on patients.

Why do doctors often oversell the benefits of a given treatment, and minimize the risks and side effects of it?

1. Treatment is rarely experienced first-hand.

While you don’t need to undergo surgery to understand the benefits of surgery or how to do surgery, you will surely have a great appreciation to the patient’s perspective if every surgeon was required to get an appendectomy before being allowed to practice. Surgeons know, in most cases only hypothetically, what it is like to go under the scalpel. I wonder how much differently a surgeon might practice if that were no longer the case.

In the same vein, I wonder how many psychiatrists would continue to prescribe atypical antipsychotics or electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) if they themselves tried it a few times. That’s because we treat fixing human problems the same way we treat fixing a car or dish disposal — it’s just plumbing and organic connections.

9/16/2023 18 comments

Exchanging Gifts With Your Therapist

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 9/3/2023

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

Exchanging Gifts With Your Therapist It’s that time of the year again — the time where gift-giving is a part of many people’s holiday rituals. While we don’t think twice about buying little gifts for close friends and family, sometimes it gives us pause to consider giving a gift to our therapist. Here’s a relationship with a professional that we see once a week, and yet it is a professional relationship (even if it doesn’t always feel that way).

What should you do? Should you exchange a little gift with your therapist?

Of course, before you do anything, you and your therapist should talk about exchanging gifts (especially if you don’t know your therapist’s policy). Some therapists are okay with it — as long as the gifts are small — while others have a strict, “No gifts” policy. In either case, it’s good to know — and respect — your therapist’s policy when it comes to gifting. So if you feel in the mood and don’t know what your psychotherapist’s policy is when it comes to exchanging gifts, please ask them during your next session.

9/3/2023 14 comments

6 Ways to Open Up and Talk in Therapy

by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. 8/9/2023

By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

6 Ways to Open Up and Talk in Therapy “I’ve shared more in my blog than I could ever tell my therapist.”

“I wish my therapist could read this online support group. Then they might begin to understand what I’m really going through.”

You’ve gathered up the energy and resources to start psychotherapy. It’s a big step and you’re excited to begin. But you find yourself unable to talk in therapy. What’s the point of talk therapy without the talking? We find it so incredibly easy to open up online, but when we’re in the therapy office, we become suddenly mute.

There are many strategies to help “open up” and be able to talk more freely while in psychotherapy. Here are a few.

1. Write it down.

One of the easiest ways to help overcome your fear or inability to talk in therapy is to write down some things that are important to you to talk about before session. Jot it down on a piece of paper, or keep a “therapy journal” even of topics or areas of your life that you want to talk about, you just find it difficult. Bring it to session, open it up, and pick a topic for that session.

8/9/2023 28 comments