Developmental Delay Archives

When taking a polygraph, my former step-son keeps creating scenarios that never occurred. We know this because they are about other family members. When the family member is questioned about rather something actually happened or not, they deny the scenario ever occurring. My former step-son is borderline developmentally delayed, had ADHD (and is off his meds because the school said he doesn’t need them, so we are having difficulty with behaviors at home including: lying, impulsivity such as stealing, emotional outbursts, being spiteful (telling me he doesn’t want me in his *blank* life when angry)), and he’s bipolar. He also hears hallucinations from time to time but ignores them.
He is currently on probation for a crime I believe he didn’t commit (but I’m not the law). The scenario happened at his mother’s apartment. However, when I first questioned him about it before he started his court appointed therapy, he told me it happened at his friend’s house. He was very confused about the details until his court appointed therapy.
He has no concept of time, due to his cognitive impairment. He says things happened a few months ago, which really happened two years ago. Then gets in trouble for it and DCF is called to investigate.
Recently, on his last polygraph (he has taken two), he admitted to doing something this January. The counselor kept asking him what happened in January. Finally, he imagined something that happened and told them. They said they have to get DCF back out to talk to him and he may be going back to jail. After talking with cousin he supposedly did something with, we know that nothing happened.
Why does he keep admitting to things he didn’t do? Why does he keep imagining things that never happened? (He once told me a scenario that if it had happened, his cousin would have never talked to him again. When I asked him for details, he couldn’t provide them. I’m pretty sure he imagined that too.) Thank you for your time.

It’s difficult to know why your stepson behaves in a particular way without being able to interview him. Thus, my response will be general in nature.

It’s possible that his developmental delays are contributing to this problem. It’s also possible that he’s confused and does not fully understand the difference between truth and lies, or perhaps reality and non-reality. I’m also wondering if he’s ever sustained brain trauma or a head injury. Brain damage might also be contributing to his behavior.

I can’t help but wonder why he is taking a polygraph test in the first place? Was he forced to because of his criminal justice system involvement? Polygraphs are not fully reliable which is why they are not permitted in court. It has been theorized that they are measuring stress and not necessarily truth or lies.

Even if you understood the reason why he lies, it would likely not make it easier to deal with them. In all likelihood, his repeated involvement in the criminal justice system is distressing to the family. It would be advantageous to consult a family therapist who could assist your family in navigating these difficult issues. It’s best to utilize all available help and support.

If you would like to write back and ask more specific questions, I will then try to provide a more detailed answer. Hopefully, with the support of a counselor or other friends and professionals, you and your family can overcome these challenging issues. Thank you for your question.

Dr. Kristina Randle

Is there a list available of character traits, habits and/or actions which would indicate in a general sense a psychological issue? ie: The person never shows embarrassment. The person hoards candy in the dresser drawers, under the bed, etc. The person is moody: sometimes depressed, angry, sulks or broods. The person never accepts responsibility or blame for wrongdoing but always blames others for whatever happens. If a glass is knocked over and spills or breaks, “it fell”. The person is slightly dyslexic, especially with numbers. Once the idea for a specific item wanted is in mind, that item will be had, no matter how much time elapses; it is not forgotten. The person does not tell jokes and rarely laughs at the humor of others. Most often the person does not understand the punchline of a joke. The person often acts as a victim. ie: purchases the wrong product because the correct one was out of stock, will be nearly driven off the road because will not use the horn, etc. In speech the person often attaches 2 totally/nearly unrelated phrases together using the word “but”. There is nothing perfect; there is something wrong/negative in everything/everyone. Nearly always there is some minor ailment: a pain here, ache there, headache, bellyache, blurry vision, etc., seemingly in contrast/competition to others who are experiencing serious medical conditions ie: hip replacement, cancer, etc. The person does not seem to understand limiting physical teasing such as pinching by saying,”That didn’t hurt.” or “I barely touched you.” The person wants everyone to recognize and be generous at birthday and other special times of giving but is not generous personally. Gifts are often not age related/appropriate such as giving a small child-sized gift to an older adolescent or teenager. The person prefers to use the walk-in bank lobby vs the drive thru because it “makes them feel important.” The person is not a deep thinker, does not have plans for nor talks about desires for the future. The person does not stay on task well and seems to be easily distracted from the task at hand. The aforementioned are quirks to the negative. The person has many positive characteristics as well, however, that is for another discussion. Thanks. (From Guatemala)

Thank you for your email. The difficulty with offering feedback is that the age and gender of the person is not included in your description, and both would be important for some accurate feedback and direction. That being said, I am struck by the fact that these descriptions all sound like they are coming from a young child, yet, if they were they wouldn’t be seen as so deviant. This leads me to the thought that this person may be chronologically older than his or her actions.

I would recommend an evaluation by a clinical psychologist skilled in testing and evaluation on an individual’s developmental level. I believe that would give you information to help understand what is going on.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
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Developmental Delay

My Former Step-Son Keeps Admitting to Things He Didn’t Do: Why?

Odd Personality Traits